CaptK Part 2

The thread was about damage suffered to cars/trucks from kangaroo strikes! Now, I know people overseas and in the cities get all warm and fuzzy about roos, but I tell you they can do bulk damage if you're not careful. Anyway, on to Keith's yarn! Anything in red is my comment on Keith's yarn, or some explanation for those unfamiliar with Oz

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Never mind the roos, what about those brain dead eagles?

Heard a bloke say on the ABC (Indy's comment. ABC is our Gov't owned radio broadcaster) a while back that eagles are on the verge of extinction, so it must be true.Well I've got news for him. There's millions of them between Port Augusta and Darwin, all feasting on freshly tenderised roadkill, courtesy of Camry drivers and Ford drivers and Truck drivers.

There's beef on the menu and sheep and pig and goat and camel and snakes and lizards but most of all....Roo.

You can usually pick them out about 2 Kms (1.5 miles) or more away, 5 or 6 at a time, squabling over a fresh bit of road kill. As you get closer they'l sort of have a look in your direction and I'm sure they only care about their feed.

I've seen Kookaburras catching snakes, Owls catching mice, hawks and kites catching all sorts of stuff, even sparrows catching bugs. I've never seen an eagle catch anything, they're just straight out scavengers and bone lazy bludgers that throw their weight around.

A couple of days ago I was south bound about about 20 Km's north of Erldunda, sure enough, a bunch of eagles on the fog line with a fresh, frisby roo, (they're called a frisby because they're flat). Now I don't like running over road kill because as posted above it spreads all over your truck and trailer, nothing like the smell of burning dead sheep or emu to make you loose your appetite. So generally I give road kill a wide berth, where practicable and the eagles generally hop away a few steps until you pass.

Not so with one of these candidates for the Charles Darwin award for for contribution to the gene pool. This idiot decided to take off and lift the roo at the same time.Well he rose with all the speed of a lump of concrete and gained just enough altitude to smack straight into my windscreen, net result, one busted windscreen and the remains of one dead roo on the bonnet.

On the positive side, KW windscreens must be tougher than Freightliner windscreens, same thing happened to old mate Gabby and the eagle ended up in his bunk, most annoyed and not very happy either.

For all their supposed greatness, eagles leave me cold, give me a bush turkey anytime, much more clever in the brains department.

2 Ripper Yarns Part 1

The next two yarns were written by a mate of mine (although we've never met) who is an interstate truckie here in Oz! I think CaptK (real name Keith van Dijk) drives road trains on Carparks up North to Darwin or somewhere. Anyway, it doesn't matter! He can write a helluver funny yarn. Please enjoy the next two posts, courtesy of CaptK!

Old mate biscuits is in sick bay, courtesy of a torn muscle in his neck, so old mate "B-Double LLoyd" gets promoted to be officer in charge of the good ship Eagle and the attached roadtrain running Adelaide - Darwin.

All is good so far.

I'm south bound out of Darwin and wheel in to the AFD depot at the Alice to get some much needed truck petrol.

All is good so far.

Old mate Lloyd pulls in a few minutes behind me, big smile on his dial, "thought I'd catch you" he said, "you just won't have a go will you" you know, the usual banter engaged in by professional truck drivers.

All is good so far.

I've finished fuelling the right hand side and have fed the nozzle and the hose between the chassis rails and the underside of the cab to fuel the left hand side.

All is good so far.

Walked around to the left hand side and pull the nozzle through, bugger, it's caught on something, give it a decent yank (sorry Dano, I pulled it very hard) and hear a scream and a thump.

All is now not so good.

Unbeknown to me, old mate Lloyd had been straddeling the hose on the other side, the first pull on the hose copped him right in the you know whats, the second pull lifted him off his feet and smacked him head first into the bowser and the steel post that holds up the canopy.

It's hard not to laugh when your mate is in agony, I had tears of sympathy running out of my eyes.Lloyd reckons it was an evil plot on my part to get him out of the road train and my behind in it.

Not so, I'm barely tough enough to drive a single, let alone all those dollies and all that extra loading.Then again, only 27 drivers to go and it will be mine I tell you, all mine, Machiavellie has got nothing on me.

I hope you enjoyed this one! Standby for the next one!!!